Oh happy days

Happiness. It can be a confusing emotion. I think we get so wrapped up in the material of what happiness could be — a nicer car, a new job, a goal weight. But that thinking doesn’t allow us to focus on the fact that true happiness is simplicity. It’s contentment, feeling safe.

That being said, we can be our biggest assets or our own worst enemy. Negativity about oneself can collapse a whole world. Don’t let it in. Those thoughts about how happy we could be if we had this, or did that… It will only make you feel worse about, well, everything. Instead, appreciate what you have — find joy in the little things, spend more time outside, and show some love for yourself.

Purposefully do this one thing for yourself today: don’t let one thought of self-doubt in. Let’s stop being so damn hard on ourselves.

“Happiness turned to me and said – It is time. It is time to forgive yourself for all of the things you did not become. It is time to exonerate yourself for all the people you couldn’t save, for all the fragile hearts you fumbled with in the dark of your confusion. It is time, child, to accept that you don’t have to be who you were a year ago, that you don’t have to want the same things. Above all else, it is time to believe, with reckless abandon, that you are worthy of me, for I have been waiting for years” Bianca Sparacino

Shades darker

So many years. So much money. So many minutes in a TANNING BED. Seriously, in college, I was SO TAN. My Irish skin was turned brown. I am proud to say I never watched Jersey Shore, but still lived that GTL (Gym, Tan, Laundry – for others who didn’t watch) life. I spent *hundreds* of dollars to lay in that bed for ten minutes, three times a week. See below, that’s me, looking like me, in 2010. I don’t look like this in 2017, I am now white. This was probably in the middle of winter, yet – I am 50 shades darker than I should ever be.

I’ll admit — I loved it. It was a nice little “getaway” off campus for a few minutes, I got to relax, it was warm, they played great music. It was an awesome 30 minutes a week. We all did it, I definitely wasn’t the only fake tan walking around Bristol. But what I didn’t realize (or maybe just didn’t even care) was that it is so bad for you.

Tans look nice, they do. They make you look healthy (which is so sad because it’s the opposite), and skinnier. But, there are other ways to do it than to ruin your skin and put yourself in risk of developing skin cancer. It took me a few years to prioritize health over my tan.

Now, if I have a wedding or event coming up and I want to be “tan,” I will get a spray tan 1-2 days before the event. Spray tans are lovely. Getting them is not the same warm, relaxing experience – they’re quite cold and uncomfortable. But – it gets the job done. Many people also do self-tan, but I have failed at this many times and turned out orange. Now, I just stick to natural sun in the warm months, but still wear sunscreen (I wear 30 SPF on my face every day).

Also, we now live in a world of filters. You don’t even have to truly be tan for people to think you are — just choose Mayfair.

Hopefully one of these days the sun will make an appearance in New England. Sigh. Until then, I’ll (palely) look forward to some Vitamin D.

You are what you think

One of the easiest ways to be happy, is to simply allow yourself to be. Unfortunately, our brains can be the biggest culprit to making us miserable. Over the past few years, I have learned how to train my brain to react to positives, and not dwell on negatives. One major factor in this was learning how to control my thoughts. We (all of us, not just girls — many boys are more sensitive than girls, contrary to what our culture tells us) have the ability to control our thoughts, and in turn our actions, emotions, and moods.

We get in our heads. But – you have the ability to change your course of thought. Think of your thoughts as a television – if you don’t like what is playing, change the channel. It is seriously as simple as that. I have tried this out on multiple occasions, and it works wonders.

For example, the other day I was driving, and all of a sudden I had a negative thought cross my mind, out of no where. It started to layer and think of other terrible situations and then — I just decided to change the “channel.” I simply closed my eyes, told myself it was just a thought – not reality – and happily went on with my day.

Similarly to when I wrote about worrying less, your thoughts are YOURS. Use them wisely. They can either empower you with inspiration, or bury you with bad feelings. I think we all know which we’d prefer. Always know that YOU are the SOLE person in charge of every. single. aspect. of your life.

No negative thoughts today!

Snow day

Oh, New England. Today is my Dad’s birthday (happy birthday, Dad!) and as I was saying to him earlier this morning, his day is unique as it can either be a beautiful, 70 degree day — or a full-on blizzard. 2017 decided to choose the snow. I’m hoping that spring will come rolling through any day now. In the meantime, let’s [try to] enjoy this weather.

There are some comforting things about a snow storm. For one, you don’t have to feel guilty for hanging on the couch all day. After all, the Governor told us to stay home. It is also a great opportunity to cook up a delicious breakfast and/or dinner you’ve been wanting to make but haven’t had the time.

Here are some other great ideas for your snow day:

  • Relax with a bubble bath
  • Find a new book to indulge in
  • Complete those small tasks you’ve been putting off, like making a Dr. appt. or scheduling your pup to get groomed
  • Do a face mask
  • Make a fire, have some hot chocolate and watch a movie you’ve wanted to see

I’ll be working from home during the day’s storm. But, will definitely be doing some of these things afterwards. What are you planning on doing during today’s snow day?

JUST IN: Cuppa Charm

Guys! I’ve been MIA for various reasons, one being my site was under renovation. I recently redid my site, and bought a new domain (I am doing cartwheels I am so excited!). You can now find me at: cuppacharm.com. This name “Cuppa Charm,” has held a special place in my heart for over 10 years now, and I am SO.so.SO excited for this name to be officially mine. I also created my new logo:

cropped-cuppacharm1

There were a few reasons for my switch, and I feel that this new website more accurately reflects what it is that I plan to write about. You’ll notice my tagline

Cultivate happiness through chaos

is really what I want to display here. Physical, emotional, spiritual and mental happiness. Just, happiness. That’s where I want this to go, for all of us.

I hope you’ll check out my new site and let me know what you think. As all things in life, it’s a work in progress.

Cheers!